Emotions and Disorders
by Cataclysmal
Summary: Bella is no damsel in distress, she's the cause of the distress. A little story about a girl who might be a little sad and what life has in store for her.


Disclaimer: I Don't own twilight.

A/N: Please share your thoughts! Thank you, Enjoy!

"_She laughed so easily when she was happy. But also when she was sad."__  
__―__Janet Fitch__,__White Oleander_

Chapter one: Epilogue

"So, what does this mean?"

"You're just too difficult to be with."

"Oh."

Time to walk away and not look back. I did so with dignity as well. Life can strip away every shred of happiness that comes my way, or might even consider coming my way- but my bloody fucking pride and dignity will stay put thank you very much.

"This is exactly what I meant, you'll never find anyone to love you with that bomb shelter you've locked yourself up in!"

Oh no, he didn't actually try and have the last word, not after breaking up with me. Big mistake.

"HE SAID HE HAD A BOMB!" I turned and screamed pointing at him before dashing out the coffee shop. He deserved that, considering he decided to waste a year of my life and end it badly in my favourite coffee shop. Not going back there again that's for sure.

So 'big cluster of dark emotions' what to do with you.

This sucks.

Ok, so I've got a few options. I can demonize him and then have a good cry (even though my tear ducts are currently out of order) and lock myself up and embrace the hermit way of life until further notice. I can bust his knee caps. Call Alice and have a 'Save me from the pits of depression fire' day or just run it off. It, being the brewing doom inside, and running it off using my running trainers. Just to clarify, of course. However, running 'it' off with my car wouldn't be so bad either; he was a jerk, who says 'you'll never find anyone to love you'?!

I will cherish that mortified look forever.

All geared up to run in my running shorts and a sports bra under a loose top, I found my ipod and hit the pavement. In a city like LA you have the ocean to run by and what more can you ask for, really?

It was a good idea, at least I'll have the endorphins high to get me through the day. It wasn't my fault he was a pushy needy sorry excuse of a boyfriend. Always pushing me to 'open up' and 'trust him'. Dude, if I wanted to talk about something, I'll talk about it. I never appreciated nor needed his clear lack of respect for my personal space.

Ok, so I guess I will demonize him a little and make it all his fault. I know it was me, duh. I honestly don't know why he stayed as long as he did. I don't know why I'm even upset, I knew this was a long time coming, I also wasn't really invested but I guess it just sucks to lose something you thought you had.

He was a bastard for breaking it off so malevolently, though. With so much anger and bitterness hidden under a bad façade of indifference too. He could have learned a thing or two about 'the bomb shelter I locked myself up in'. He wanted to hurt me though, which he had every right to want to. I treated his inquisitive nature with a cold silence and his probing and pushing with indefinite absence. It was actually all very dramatic, but crappy day time soap opera dramatic.

I was a crazy heartless bitch, I think.

Oh no, the flood gates are open now. Tear ducts are back in the tear making business. I found a nice spot on the sand and nestled there wiping off a few tears.

That's what thinking does. Thinking is bad when running. Bad Bella.

I sighed and took a few deep breaths. Wiped all the evidence of weakness away and just stared out at the ocean blankly. No thoughts, just blue waves.

"Hey, here." I heard a deep voice say from beside me. I looked up and saw a Fiji bottle of water, I followed the extended tanned veiny arm to look at the Fiji stranger.

"I thought creepy strangers offered candy." I said dryly, turning my head away. He was too handsome for his own good, but a little too random with the water bottle for my taste.

"New management. We're healthier now." He deadpanned. I felt the corners of my lips turn up. Traitors.

I glanced at him and accepted the water bottle with a small thank you.

"I live there," He pointed at the row of fancy houses " and I saw you stop here. Thought you might be thirsty."

"Who runs without water, Fiji?" I asked showing him my stainless steel water container, still half full.

He raised his eyebrows slightly "Why'd you accept it then?"

"Your water was better than my water." I shrugged.

"Sound logic there." He said crossing his arms.

"I'm a little crazy then, how about that?"

"We're all a little crazy." He said smirking at me before snatching his water bottle back.

"Hey!" I yelled after him as he half jogged to what I presumed to be his house "What the hell?!"

He looked back grinning at me before disappearing behind a sliding glass door.

I couldn't wipe the smile off my face as I headed back home. Fiji man cheered me up a little.

What an odd crappy day. Life, what do you have in store for me?

Xxx

Review please! Shall I continue? Your opinions matter x.


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